


breathe away

by wilfre



Category: Team Fortress 2
Genre: Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-15
Updated: 2019-05-15
Packaged: 2020-03-06 01:20:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18840715
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wilfre/pseuds/wilfre
Summary: spy accidentally discovers something he kinda wish he hadn't.





	breathe away

**Author's Note:**

> this couldve been a cute fic about the mercs having fun on a rainy day but i had to take a detour to emoville
> 
> also sorry to scout for making him my punching bag xx

A dreary day at the base. If the sun hadn't come up, none of them would've noticed; it had been storming all night and well into the morning. With dark gray clouds looming overhead, the natural light was absent. Rain steadily pattered against the windows as Demoman trudged into the kitchen. Soldier, Spy, Engineer, Heavy, and Medic were seated at the table.

Soldier frowned upon the other man's entrance. "You are late for breakfast. And you are still in your sleeping uniform!"

Demo groaned, rubbing his eye and trying to look for his mug. The cups clattered together in the cabinet. "Jesus, can ye leave someone be for two seconds? It's a ceasefire day, yer lucky I'm up at all."

He poured water into the coffee maker before shoveling in coffee grounds, too tired to care for precise measurements. The machine came to life with a soft buzz. As he waited for the pot to fill up, he started rummaging through the pantry.

"Alright. Whoever ate the last of the Honeycombs is gettin' an ass whoopin'." He turned to the other mercs, squinting at their bowls. "Where's Sniper? I bet it was that bloody idiot.." Grumbling to himself, he left to find and interrogate the potential cereal thief.

Spy smirked, straightening out his newspaper. "It was me."

A loud yawn reached the room before the person emitting it did. Scout padded into the room, wearing a shirt three sizes too big for him and leaving the others to hope he was wearing shorts underneath.

Soldier eyed him from underneath his helmet. Though they weren't fighting today, he was still in uniform. As always. The mercs often wondered if he had anything else in his closet. "You are la—"

"Yeah, yeah, I know." Scout made a beeline for the pantry, pulling out a box of the sugariest cereal that only him and Pyro dared to touch. He plopped down at the table, pouring flakes straight into his mouth.

Heavy watched for a moment. "..Do you want bowl?"

"Nah."

"Okay."

Soldier stabbed at the rest of his mix of undercooked and overcooked eggs. "I am going to make more eggs. Would anyone like s—"

"No," the others immediately chorused. Soldier stood and started up the stove. The rain was still steadily beating on, the dim and dying kitchen light softly buzzing underneath it all. Sniper would have to get a new bulb the next time he went to the store. Along with more Honeycombs, of course. The coffee pot sputtered.

Soldier ate his unevenly cooked eggs straight from the pan like an absolute animal before dumping the pan in the sink and leaving to do Soldier things. Medic sleepily leaned against Heavy's shoulder and helped him with a crossword puzzle, Engineer played Sudoku, Spy read his newspaper, and Scout simply ate handfuls of cereal. The atmosphere was soft and low-key; it was quiet besides the calming pitter-patter of rain, Medic's gentle murmuring, and Scout's chewing. No screaming, fighting, or any other chaos. Peace.

Suddenly, there was the loud crack of lightning, shortly followed by the even louder boom of thunder. The lights flickered, then died completely.

"Oh, great," Spy muttered. He tossed his newspaper onto the table. "Where is Pyro when we need th—"

Heavy footsteps raced down the hall hard enough to make the utensils and plates at the table bounce and clatter. Speak of the devil; Pyro ran into the kitchen, distressed noises coming from under the mask. They hurried over to Engineer, clutching him for dear life.

"What's the matter?" Scout asked through a mouthful of cereal, "You afraid of the dark or somethin'?"

"Not so much afraid of the dark," Engie answered for them, returning the embrace and patting them on the back. "Moreso afraid of the sudden dark." He whispered something to the other and they nodded against his chest; the two of them stood up and headed back down the hall.

Medic swirled the rest of his tea around in his cup. "Hopefully they are going to get some candles."

The storm beat on even harder than before, thunder cracking more often and practically shaking the whole base. Demo finally returned, feeling around in front of him so he didn't bump into anything. The extremely faint light from the window barely illuminated the room, just enough to make out general shapes.

"Oh, thank God it's just an outage. I thought I had lost me sight completely." He made his way over to the coffee pot before remembering a crucial detail—"Ach, where did I put me mug… Dammit, how am I gonna find it now?"

Pyro to the rescue! They entered with Engie, carrying one lit candle with a bunch more under their arm. They placed it on the table before leaving to light up the rest of the base.

Another person trudged into the kitchen: Sniper. He was dripping wet; he had come in from his van.

Spy eyed him in amusement. "Look what the cat dragged in."

"Shut up." He began pulling his clothes off, letting them drop to the floor with wet _plop_ s. He reached for his belt buckle, and Medic's eyes widened but he said nothing. That is, until the pants were off and Sniper had his fingers hooked around his boxers.

"Ah ah ah ah ah!" Medic exclaimed, hopping out of his seat and running over to the other man. He placed his hands on his wet shoulders, spinning him around and starting to push him out of the room. "Not in here. You may have no problem displaying your private parts for the whole world to see, but some of us have a problem being the whole world. Go. Shoo."

Spy nodded gratefully. "You're a hero, doctor."

"Oh, I'm no hero. The real hero is whoever picks up these wet clothes, because it certainly isn't gonna be me."

They all looked at each other. Slowly, their gazes all turned to Scout. Scout stopped mid-chew and somehow met all their gazes at once. Then, he did what he does best: ran.

Or tried to, rather.

Spy swiftly stood up and grabbed him by the wrist, earning something unexpected—a yell. Well, it was a bit expected, but not one as big as Scout made. He hadn't even grabbed him that hard!

"Ow!" Scout cried, eyebrows knitting together in pain. "Ow, ow ow, let go!" Spy raised an eyebrow, tightening his grip and earning another yell.

"Oh, sorry," Spy said, voice dripping with sarcasm, "I thought you said _don't_ let go!" He grinned, but it faltered into an unsure smile as Scout desperately tried to wriggle out of his grasp.

"Spy, this ain't fuckin' funny, let GO!" His voice cracked, and the genuinity in it took Spy aback—he let go. Scout only looked back at him for a split second before booking it to his room, but in that second, Spy saw tears in his eyes.

Nobody said it, but they were all thinking it: what the hell?

Demo awkwardly took a sip of his coffee. Medic and Heavy shared a confused glance before they both looked at Spy.

Heavy said the second thing on all their minds. "You should check on him."

A sigh. Spy straightened out his shirt. "I suppose you're right."

 

The door was locked. Not surprising.

Funny how Scout thought that'd stop anyone, though.

Spy let himself in after picking the lock. He lingered in the doorway, unsure if he should make his presence known; Scout was buried in a heap of blankets, and if he had noticed Spy come in, he wasn't showing it.

He cleared his throat. "Scout." The pile shifted, a hand poking out, and then a face. It was twisted in anger.

"Get the hell outta here!" he snarled, throwing the blankets off and hopping to his feet. He tried to shove Spy out the door, but was easily countered by the other man.

"Not until you tell me what _that_ was about." Spy pushed his way in, shutting the door behind him.

"It wasn't about anythin', okay?!" Scout uselessly pounded at Spy's chest. "Why can't you just go?!"

Spy caught his wrist again, making sure to hold it loosely but still tight enough to keep it mostly in place.

"Quit it!"

What could've caused him to have such an adverse reaction? Spy inspected the limb, unexpectedly finding dried blood stains on the light sleeves of his shirt.

And in that moment, it all made sense.

The long sleeves; he had been wearing almost nothing but long sleeves the past few weeks, and when he wasn't, his usual bandages went well up his arm. The recent lack of chattiness. The amount of time spent in his room or the bathroom. _Spy's missing knife._

How hadn’t he noticed sooner? It was his _job,_  for God’s sake. He couldn’t believe it.

A defeated look formed on Scout’s face as he recognized the realization on Spy’s. Spy rolled up the sleeve to confirm it, and Scout didn’t protest—several barely-healed cuts were spread across Scout’s skin. He wished he had been wrong. Spy let go, the other man’s wrist limply flopping down to his side.

“So when were you planning on telling anyone?”

Scout stared down at the ground, embarrassed tears stinging his eyes. He rolled his sleeve back down. “You weren’t supposed to find out.”

“But I did.”

There was a thick, uncomfortable silence. Neither knew what to say next. The rain still beat down on the base.

Scout eventually sniffled. “Can you just go?” He wiped his nose. “Leave me alone.”

“I cannot ignore a teammate in distress.”

“Yeah you can! Watch. Like this.” Scout turned his back to the other man, pretending to ignore him to make his point. He faced him again. “See? Easy! Now you try!”

“Scout..”

“Why do you always gotta be in everyone’s business?! I get you’re a Spy and all, but why can’t you just leave me alone this once?! I’m askin' you as a teammate, as a—as a _friend_ , to just.. Just..” He choked on his words, and a loud clap of thunder boomed outside. The rain beat down harder. His tears were streaming down his face faster than he could wipe them away.

The second curveball of the day was thrown at Spy.

Before he could process what was happening, a pair of arms was wrapped around his midsection and a sobbing face pressed against his chest.

He gingerly returned the embrace, patting Scout on the back in what he hoped was a comforting gesture.

“It’s.. It’s alright, let it out.”

The rain slowed to a gentle patter. Scout’s shaky sobs turned into soft hiccups.

He pulled away from Spy, trying to wipe the wet spot off the other man’s shirt as an afterthought.

“...Don’t tell the other guys about this. Please. I know you love spillin’ other people’s secrets and all, but th—”

“I won’t.”

“..Really?”

“I promise you, Scout, I will not tell a soul. However—” Spy put his hands on the boy’s shoulders and held him out at arm’s length, looking him hard in the eyes, “I strongly advise you to talk to someone; Medic, Sniper, whoever you can confide in. Do not keep these feelings bottled up.”

Scout sniffled and coughed, wiping his nose. “Okay.”

“I’m serious.”

“I know.”

“I promised you I would not tell anyone, so now make me a promise. Promise you will talk to someone.”

“I will. I promise.”

Spy let him go. “Good. Who it is doesn’t matter, as long as you—”

“You.”

“What?”

“I wanna talk to you.”

“Oh.” He cleared his throat. “Alright.”

Now it was Scout’s turn to take Spy by the wrist. He gently grabbed him and started leading him out the door. “Let’s go to your room.”

Spy raised his eyebrows, but followed along nonetheless. “Right now?”

“I mean..” Scout stopped in his place. “If you’re cool with it.”

Spy smiled a tender, genuine smile, reversing the roles and tugging the boy along.

“Anything for a friend.”

**Author's Note:**

> i feel like my fics are too dialogue heavy and it makes me go grrr so i tried to include more descriptions and stuff  
> ┐(‘～` )┌


End file.
